Does saying someone’s name give you power over them, or them power over you?
I feel bad sometimes, I talk to people, and I never use their names. Then when I decide to use their names, I never find a place where I could say it and make it sound like it’s part of the natural conversation flow; and then sometimes I don’t want to say peoples’ names because I consider them to be more important than me, and even though they add my name to the end of every sentence, it feels wrong to say their name.
So anyways, I’m weird like that.
I don’t want to seem like I’m admitting defeat every time I have a conversation, yet I don’t want to make myself seem more important than the other person by taking away their power. I have this really crazy ingrained process of hierarchy in my mind. Well, there are people that I’ve known for over a year now, and I’ve never said their names when I’ve talked to them; and then I was helping one of them in Math a while ago, and they turned around and I still had something to say, and I just said their name; and now I’m not sure where I stand in relation to that person because they were always above me before, but now… …now we seem almost equal, which shouldn’t be possible.
I can’t do anything without thinking about how it will affect my place in relation to others. It’s this subconscious thing.
On the internet though, I don’t have any problems with saying peoples’ names; probably because the nicknames always seem so fake.
I mean, it would feel weird for someone to walk up to me and say “Hey Paradox” (although I would likely answer them)